<-Jokes
4 posters
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<-Jokes
by K!ddo™ Wed Jul 22, 2009 11:44 am
There was this guy at a bar, just looking at his drink. He stays like that for half of an hour.
Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."
"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."
"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."
One guy come to a bar. he saying to the barman: "give me beer, fast before its start!!!"
The barman giving him beer.
He saying again: "again give me beer, fast before its start!!!"
The bar man giving him the beer.
He saying again: "again give me beer, fast before its start!!!"
The bar man giving him the beer and ask: "How you gonna pay for all this???
The man answers: "Here its start...."
Three Irishmen passed a graveyard while they were stumbling home from a night at their favorite pub. "Come look over here," the first man said. "It's Micheal O'Grady's grave. The tombstone says that he lived to the ripe old age of 87."
"Thats nothing," the second man replied.
"Here's one named Patrick O'Toole. He was 95 when he died."
The last Irishmen exclaimed, "Good God, heres a fellow who lived until he was 145."
"What was his name?" the other two asked.
The thrid Irishman lit a match and said,
"Miles, From Dublin."
A man was driving up a winding mountian road as a woman driving the other way leaned out her window and yelled,
"Pig!"
The man leaned out his window and yelled,
"B*tch!"
After he rounded the next curve, he ran into a pig.
Then, this big trouble-making truck driver steps next to him, takes the drink from the guy, and just drinks it all down. The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says, "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't stand to see a man cry."
"No, it's not that. This day is the worst of my life. First, I fall asleep, and I go late to my office. My boss, outrageous, fires me. When I leave the building, to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police said that they can do nothing. I get a cab to return home, and when I leave it, I remember I left my wallet and credit cards there. The cab driver just drives away."
"I go home, and when I get there, I find my wife in bed with the gardener. I leave home, and come to this bar. And just when I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison."
One guy come to a bar. he saying to the barman: "give me beer, fast before its start!!!"
The barman giving him beer.
He saying again: "again give me beer, fast before its start!!!"
The bar man giving him the beer.
He saying again: "again give me beer, fast before its start!!!"
The bar man giving him the beer and ask: "How you gonna pay for all this???
The man answers: "Here its start...."
Three Irishmen passed a graveyard while they were stumbling home from a night at their favorite pub. "Come look over here," the first man said. "It's Micheal O'Grady's grave. The tombstone says that he lived to the ripe old age of 87."
"Thats nothing," the second man replied.
"Here's one named Patrick O'Toole. He was 95 when he died."
The last Irishmen exclaimed, "Good God, heres a fellow who lived until he was 145."
"What was his name?" the other two asked.
The thrid Irishman lit a match and said,
"Miles, From Dublin."
A man was driving up a winding mountian road as a woman driving the other way leaned out her window and yelled,
"Pig!"
The man leaned out his window and yelled,
"B*tch!"
After he rounded the next curve, he ran into a pig.
K!ddo™- The Coolest Kid!
- Posts : 222
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Age : 28
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Re: <-Jokes
by K!ddo™ Wed Jul 22, 2009 11:46 am
Blonde woman, black woman and a ballerina walking at the street.
There coming a witch and say: "everytime u gonna lie im gonna make u disapper".
The ballerina say: "im the best dancer in the world!!!".
she disapper...
The black woman say: "im s*xy woman!"
She disapper.
The blond woman meet her friend and the friend ask her: "where they disappered???"
The blond woman answeres: "Sec im thinking!!!"
She disappered...
My Favorite:
A husband called his wife for her first game of golf in her life. And as expected, her first shot ended up in a window of a big house. The husband got pissed, and made her to go there, apologize and pay for the damage on the window. He went with her.
The couple came to the house and knocked on the door. They heard a voice inviting them in from inside. When they came inside they realized they broke an expensive antique vase too. On the chair a young man was sitting. They apologized and said they will pay for the damage. He said that isn't neccessary and that he is a ghost that was trapped in that vase for 1000 years. He said he will fulfill a wish for both of them,and that they have to fulfill 1 for him. the couple agreed. The husband requested 1 million dollars each year until the end of his life. The ghost said ok and gave him long and healthy life too. the wife said she wants a big house in every country in the world. The ghost agreed and guaranteed her the houses will be safe of every burglar, of fires etc.
Now it's the ghost's turn, and he wants sex with the wife. After a long talk they agreed that since both are rich, they can live with that. And after couple of hours of sex, the ghost stopped and asked the wife how old they are . She said they are both 35 and the ghost replied: "No kidding! 35 and you both still believe in ghosts?!"
American, Israeli and Arabi fly on a plain.
The American throw 100$.
They ask him: "Why did u throw it?"
He say: "I got a lot of those in my country."
The Arabi throw a granade.
They ask him: "Why did u throw it?"
He say: "I got a lot of those in my country."
The Israeli take the Arabian, and throw him our of the plain.
The American ask him: "Why did u throw him?"
The Israeli say: "I got a lot of those in my country."
There coming a witch and say: "everytime u gonna lie im gonna make u disapper".
The ballerina say: "im the best dancer in the world!!!".
she disapper...
The black woman say: "im s*xy woman!"
She disapper.
The blond woman meet her friend and the friend ask her: "where they disappered???"
The blond woman answeres: "Sec im thinking!!!"
She disappered...
My Favorite:
A husband called his wife for her first game of golf in her life. And as expected, her first shot ended up in a window of a big house. The husband got pissed, and made her to go there, apologize and pay for the damage on the window. He went with her.
The couple came to the house and knocked on the door. They heard a voice inviting them in from inside. When they came inside they realized they broke an expensive antique vase too. On the chair a young man was sitting. They apologized and said they will pay for the damage. He said that isn't neccessary and that he is a ghost that was trapped in that vase for 1000 years. He said he will fulfill a wish for both of them,and that they have to fulfill 1 for him. the couple agreed. The husband requested 1 million dollars each year until the end of his life. The ghost said ok and gave him long and healthy life too. the wife said she wants a big house in every country in the world. The ghost agreed and guaranteed her the houses will be safe of every burglar, of fires etc.
Now it's the ghost's turn, and he wants sex with the wife. After a long talk they agreed that since both are rich, they can live with that. And after couple of hours of sex, the ghost stopped and asked the wife how old they are . She said they are both 35 and the ghost replied: "No kidding! 35 and you both still believe in ghosts?!"
American, Israeli and Arabi fly on a plain.
The American throw 100$.
They ask him: "Why did u throw it?"
He say: "I got a lot of those in my country."
The Arabi throw a granade.
They ask him: "Why did u throw it?"
He say: "I got a lot of those in my country."
The Israeli take the Arabian, and throw him our of the plain.
The American ask him: "Why did u throw him?"
The Israeli say: "I got a lot of those in my country."
Last edited by K!ddo™ on Mon Aug 10, 2009 1:24 pm; edited 1 time in total
K!ddo™- The Coolest Kid!
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Re: <-Jokes
by Dede Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:05 am
I walked into a Starbucks with a buy-one-get- one-free coupon for a Grande Latte. I handed it to the girl and she looked over at a little chalkboard that said "buy one-get one free." "They're already buy-one- get-one-free, " she said, "so I guess they're both free". She handed me my free Lattes and I walked out the door.
One day I was walking down the beach with some Friends when one of them shouted, "Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked up at the sky and said, "Where?"
While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6.He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces
Dark In Here:
A woman takes a lover home during the day while her husband is at work. Her 9-year old son comes home unexpectedly, sees them and hides in the bedroom closet to watch.
The woman's husband also comes home. She puts her lover in the closet, not realizing that the little boy is in there already.
The little boy says, "Dark in here."
The man says, "Yes, it is."
Boy - "I have a baseball."
Man - "That's nice."
Boy - "Want to buy it?"
Man - "No, thanks."
Boy - "My dad's outside."
Man - "OK, how much?"
Boy - "$250"
In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the lover are in the closet together..
Boy - "Dark in here."
Man - "Yes, it is."
Boy - "I have a baseball glove."
The lover, remembering the last time, asks the boy, "How much?"
Boy - "$750"
Man - "Sold."
A few days later, the father says to the boy, "Grab your glove, let's go outside and have a game of catch.
The boy says, "I can't, I sold my baseball and my glove."
The father asks, "How much did you sell them for?"
Boy -"$1,000."
The father says, "That 's terrible to overcharge your friends like
that. that is way more than those two things cost. I'm going to take you to church and make you confess."
They go to the church and the father makes the little boy sit in the
confession booth and he closes the door.
The boy says, "Dark in here."
The priest says, "Don't start that **** again; you're in my closet now."
One day I was walking down the beach with some Friends when one of them shouted, "Look at that dead bird!" Someone looked up at the sky and said, "Where?"
While working at a pizza parlor I observed a man ordering a small pizza to go. He appeared to be alone and the cook asked him if he would like it cut into 4 pieces or 6.He thought about it for some time before responding. "Just cut it into 4 pieces; I don't think I'm hungry enough to eat 6 pieces
Dark In Here:
A woman takes a lover home during the day while her husband is at work. Her 9-year old son comes home unexpectedly, sees them and hides in the bedroom closet to watch.
The woman's husband also comes home. She puts her lover in the closet, not realizing that the little boy is in there already.
The little boy says, "Dark in here."
The man says, "Yes, it is."
Boy - "I have a baseball."
Man - "That's nice."
Boy - "Want to buy it?"
Man - "No, thanks."
Boy - "My dad's outside."
Man - "OK, how much?"
Boy - "$250"
In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the lover are in the closet together..
Boy - "Dark in here."
Man - "Yes, it is."
Boy - "I have a baseball glove."
The lover, remembering the last time, asks the boy, "How much?"
Boy - "$750"
Man - "Sold."
A few days later, the father says to the boy, "Grab your glove, let's go outside and have a game of catch.
The boy says, "I can't, I sold my baseball and my glove."
The father asks, "How much did you sell them for?"
Boy -"$1,000."
The father says, "That 's terrible to overcharge your friends like
that. that is way more than those two things cost. I'm going to take you to church and make you confess."
They go to the church and the father makes the little boy sit in the
confession booth and he closes the door.
The boy says, "Dark in here."
The priest says, "Don't start that **** again; you're in my closet now."
Dede- TamerUniv Novice
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Join date : 2009-07-13
Age : 31
Location : Georgia/UK
Re: <-Jokes
by Dede Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:07 am
Little Johnny's at it again
Little Johnny's at it again..... A new teacher was trying to make use of her
psychology courses. She started her class by saying, 'Everyone who thinks
they're stupid, stand up!' After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The
teacher said, 'Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?' 'No, ma'am, but I
hate to see you standing there all by yourself!'
Little Johnny watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her
face. 'Why do you do that, mommy?' he asked. 'To make myself beautiful,' sai
d his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue. 'What's the
matter?' asked Little Johnny. 'Giving up?'
The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn't paying attention in class.
She called on him and said,
'Johnny! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?' Little Johnny quickly replied,
'NBC, FOX, ESPN and the Cartoon Network!'
Little Johnny's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police
station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the 10 most
wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it
really was the photo of a wanted person. 'Yes,' said the policeman. 'The
detectives want very badly to capture him.' Little Johnny asked, 'Why didn't you
keep him when yo u took his picture ?'
Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his
father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse's
legs and rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Johnny asked, 'Dad, why are you
doing that?' His father replied, 'Because when I'm buying horses, I have to
make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy. Johnny,
looking worried, said, 'Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom .'
Little Johnny's at it again..... A new teacher was trying to make use of her
psychology courses. She started her class by saying, 'Everyone who thinks
they're stupid, stand up!' After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The
teacher said, 'Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?' 'No, ma'am, but I
hate to see you standing there all by yourself!'
Little Johnny watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her
face. 'Why do you do that, mommy?' he asked. 'To make myself beautiful,' sai
d his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue. 'What's the
matter?' asked Little Johnny. 'Giving up?'
The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn't paying attention in class.
She called on him and said,
'Johnny! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?' Little Johnny quickly replied,
'NBC, FOX, ESPN and the Cartoon Network!'
Little Johnny's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police
station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the 10 most
wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it
really was the photo of a wanted person. 'Yes,' said the policeman. 'The
detectives want very badly to capture him.' Little Johnny asked, 'Why didn't you
keep him when yo u took his picture ?'
Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his
father moved from horse to horse, running his hands up and down the horse's
legs and rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Johnny asked, 'Dad, why are you
doing that?' His father replied, 'Because when I'm buying horses, I have to
make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy. Johnny,
looking worried, said, 'Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom .'
Dede- TamerUniv Novice
- Posts : 63
Join date : 2009-07-13
Age : 31
Location : Georgia/UK
Re: <-Jokes
by Dede Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:09 am
A boy and his father were playing ball in the front yard when the boy saw a honeybee. He ran over and stomped it.
"Don't do that, that was a honeybee," his father said, "he wasn't doing anything to you. For killing him you will do without honey for a week."
Later the boy saw a butterfly, so he ran over and stomped on it.
"That was a butterfly," his father said, "he wasn't doing anything to you, and for killing him you will do without butter for a week."
The next morning the family sat down for breakfast. The boy eating his toast plain with no honey or butter.
Suddenly a cockroach ran out from under the stove. His mother stomped on it.
The boy looked at his father and said, "Are you going to tell her, Dad, or should I?"
"Don't do that, that was a honeybee," his father said, "he wasn't doing anything to you. For killing him you will do without honey for a week."
Later the boy saw a butterfly, so he ran over and stomped on it.
"That was a butterfly," his father said, "he wasn't doing anything to you, and for killing him you will do without butter for a week."
The next morning the family sat down for breakfast. The boy eating his toast plain with no honey or butter.
Suddenly a cockroach ran out from under the stove. His mother stomped on it.
The boy looked at his father and said, "Are you going to tell her, Dad, or should I?"
Dede- TamerUniv Novice
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Age : 31
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Shuraka- TamerUniv Leader
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Join date : 2009-07-13
Age : 33 -
K!ddo™- The Coolest Kid!
- Posts : 222
Join date : 2009-07-13
Age : 28
Location : Haifa, Israel -
Re: <-Jokes
by K!ddo™ Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:19 am
The General went out to find that none of his G.I.s were there. One finally ran up, panting heavily.
"Sorry, sir! I can explain, you see I had a date and it ran a little late. I ran to the bus but missed it, I hailed a cab but it broke down, found a farm, bought a horse but it dropped dead, ran 10 miles, and now I'm here."
The General was very skeptical about this explanation but at least he was here so he let the G.I. go. Moments later, eight more G.I.s came up to the general panting, he asked them why they were late.
"Sorry, sir! I had a date and it ran a little late, I ran to the bus but missed it, I hailed a cab but it broke down, found a farm, bought a horse but it dropped dead, ran 10 miles, and now I'm here."
The General eyed them, feeling very skeptical but since he let the first guy go, he let them go, too. A ninth G.I. jogged up to the General, panting heavily.
"Sorry, sir! I had a date and it ran a little late, I ran to the bus but missed it, I hailed a cab but..."
"Let me guess," the General interrupted, "it broke down."
A modern Orthodox Jewish couple, preparing for a religious wedding, meets the rabbi who is supposed to perform the ceremony. The rabbi asks if they have any last questions before they leave.
The man asks, "Rabbi, we realize it's tradition for men to dance with men, and women to dance with women. But, we'd like your permission to dance together."
The rabbi answers, "No way! "Men and women always dance separately!"
The man then asks, "So after the ceremony you mean I can't even dance with my own wife?"
The rabbi replies, "It's forbidden!"
The man asks, "Can we finally have sex?"
The rabbi replies, "Of course! Sex is a mitzvah within marriage, to have many children!"
"What about different positions?" asked the man?
"No problem," says the rabbi, "It's a mitzvah!"
"Well then, how about a woman on top?" the man asks.
Rabbi replies, "It's mitzvah!"
"How about Doggy Style?"
"Another mitzvah!"
"On the kitchen table?"
"A mitzvah!"
"Can we do it on rubber sheets with a bottle of hot oil, a couple of vibrators, a leather harness, a bucket of honey and a porno film?"
"It's all a mitzvah!"
"Can we do it standing up?"
"NO, NO, NO!" cries the rabbi.
"Well, why not?" asks the man.
Rabbi answers, "Could lead to dancing!"
"Sorry, sir! I can explain, you see I had a date and it ran a little late. I ran to the bus but missed it, I hailed a cab but it broke down, found a farm, bought a horse but it dropped dead, ran 10 miles, and now I'm here."
The General was very skeptical about this explanation but at least he was here so he let the G.I. go. Moments later, eight more G.I.s came up to the general panting, he asked them why they were late.
"Sorry, sir! I had a date and it ran a little late, I ran to the bus but missed it, I hailed a cab but it broke down, found a farm, bought a horse but it dropped dead, ran 10 miles, and now I'm here."
The General eyed them, feeling very skeptical but since he let the first guy go, he let them go, too. A ninth G.I. jogged up to the General, panting heavily.
"Sorry, sir! I had a date and it ran a little late, I ran to the bus but missed it, I hailed a cab but..."
"Let me guess," the General interrupted, "it broke down."
A modern Orthodox Jewish couple, preparing for a religious wedding, meets the rabbi who is supposed to perform the ceremony. The rabbi asks if they have any last questions before they leave.
The man asks, "Rabbi, we realize it's tradition for men to dance with men, and women to dance with women. But, we'd like your permission to dance together."
The rabbi answers, "No way! "Men and women always dance separately!"
The man then asks, "So after the ceremony you mean I can't even dance with my own wife?"
The rabbi replies, "It's forbidden!"
The man asks, "Can we finally have sex?"
The rabbi replies, "Of course! Sex is a mitzvah within marriage, to have many children!"
"What about different positions?" asked the man?
"No problem," says the rabbi, "It's a mitzvah!"
"Well then, how about a woman on top?" the man asks.
Rabbi replies, "It's mitzvah!"
"How about Doggy Style?"
"Another mitzvah!"
"On the kitchen table?"
"A mitzvah!"
"Can we do it on rubber sheets with a bottle of hot oil, a couple of vibrators, a leather harness, a bucket of honey and a porno film?"
"It's all a mitzvah!"
"Can we do it standing up?"
"NO, NO, NO!" cries the rabbi.
"Well, why not?" asks the man.
Rabbi answers, "Could lead to dancing!"
K!ddo™- The Coolest Kid!
- Posts : 222
Join date : 2009-07-13
Age : 28
Location : Haifa, Israel -
Re: <-Jokes
by Dede Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:26 am
Two guys and a girl were sitting at a bar talking about their lives.
The one guy said, "I'm a YUPPIE. You know, Young Urban Professional."
The second guy responded, "I'm a DINK. You know, Double Income No Kids."
They then asked the woman, "What are you?"
She replied: "I'm a WIFE. You know, Wash, Iron, ****, Etc.
HEHEHEHEH for kiddo and the boys
The Top 10 reasons why a handgun is better than a woman
#10 - You can trade an old .44 for two new .22s.
#9 - You can keep one handgun at home and have another for when you're on the road.
#8 - If you admire a friend's handgun, and tell him so, he will probably let you try it out a few times.
#7 - Your primary handgun doesn't mind if you have a backup.
#6 - Your handgun will stay with you even if you're out of ammo.
#5 - A handgun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.
#4 - Handguns function normally every day of the month.
#3 - A handgun doesn't ask "Do these new grips make me look fat?"
#2 - A handgun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.
AND THE NUMBER ONE WAY THAT A HANDGUN IS BETTER THAN A WOMAN . . . You can buy a silencer for a handgun.
two guys were in a bar, and they were both watching the television when the news came on.
It showed a guy on a bridge who was about to jump, obviously suicidal.
"I'll bet you 10$ he'll jump", said the first guy, "Bet you 10$ he wont", said the second guy, "Ur on" said the first.
then, the guy on the television closed his eyes and threw himself off the bridge.
the second guy hands the first guy the money, "I cant take ur money ........" the first guy says, "I cheated you, the same story was on the five o'clock news".
"No,no take it...."says the second guy, "I saw the five o'clock news too, I just didnt think the guy was dump enough to jump again".
Question:why is there seventeen girls standing outside a nightclub a saturday night?
Anwser: Because u need to be eighteen to get in.
Nerd ona bike
A nerd was walking on campus one day when his friend, another nerd, rode up on an incredible shiny new bicycle.
The first nerd was stunned and asked, "Where did you get such a nice bike?"
The second nerd replied, "Well, yesterday I was walking home minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up to me on this bike.
She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, 'Take what you want!'"
The second nerd nodded approvingly and said, "Good choice. The clothes probably wouldn't have fit.
The one guy said, "I'm a YUPPIE. You know, Young Urban Professional."
The second guy responded, "I'm a DINK. You know, Double Income No Kids."
They then asked the woman, "What are you?"
She replied: "I'm a WIFE. You know, Wash, Iron, ****, Etc.
HEHEHEHEH for kiddo and the boys
The Top 10 reasons why a handgun is better than a woman
#10 - You can trade an old .44 for two new .22s.
#9 - You can keep one handgun at home and have another for when you're on the road.
#8 - If you admire a friend's handgun, and tell him so, he will probably let you try it out a few times.
#7 - Your primary handgun doesn't mind if you have a backup.
#6 - Your handgun will stay with you even if you're out of ammo.
#5 - A handgun doesn't take up a lot of closet space.
#4 - Handguns function normally every day of the month.
#3 - A handgun doesn't ask "Do these new grips make me look fat?"
#2 - A handgun doesn't mind if you go to sleep after you use it.
AND THE NUMBER ONE WAY THAT A HANDGUN IS BETTER THAN A WOMAN . . . You can buy a silencer for a handgun.
two guys were in a bar, and they were both watching the television when the news came on.
It showed a guy on a bridge who was about to jump, obviously suicidal.
"I'll bet you 10$ he'll jump", said the first guy, "Bet you 10$ he wont", said the second guy, "Ur on" said the first.
then, the guy on the television closed his eyes and threw himself off the bridge.
the second guy hands the first guy the money, "I cant take ur money ........" the first guy says, "I cheated you, the same story was on the five o'clock news".
"No,no take it...."says the second guy, "I saw the five o'clock news too, I just didnt think the guy was dump enough to jump again".
Question:why is there seventeen girls standing outside a nightclub a saturday night?
Anwser: Because u need to be eighteen to get in.
Nerd ona bike
A nerd was walking on campus one day when his friend, another nerd, rode up on an incredible shiny new bicycle.
The first nerd was stunned and asked, "Where did you get such a nice bike?"
The second nerd replied, "Well, yesterday I was walking home minding my own business when a beautiful woman rode up to me on this bike.
She threw the bike to the ground, took off all her clothes and said, 'Take what you want!'"
The second nerd nodded approvingly and said, "Good choice. The clothes probably wouldn't have fit.
Dede- TamerUniv Novice
- Posts : 63
Join date : 2009-07-13
Age : 31
Location : Georgia/UK
Re: <-Jokes
by K!ddo™ Thu Jul 23, 2009 10:48 am
One woman takes a shower, someone knocks on the door.
-Whos There?
-Its ur neibors.
The cover herself and open the door.
-tell us congratilations.
-congratilations, but why?
-we born a child =)
After 5 min someone knocks on the door.
-Whos There?
-Its the Thief.
She cover herself and opens the door.
-tell me congratilations.
-congratilations, but why?
-I runned away from the cup (police).
After a while... someone knocks again on the door.
-Whos There?
-Its the cup.
She cover herself and opens the door.
-tell me congratilations.
-congratilations, but why?
-I coutch the Thief =)
After a while... someone again knocks the door.
-Whos there?
-Its the blind man.
she thinks, its ok anyway he is blind so he wont see me, so the doesnt cover herself and open the door.
He tell her: tell me congratilations.
-congratilations, but why?
-Im not blind anymore.
-Whos There?
-Its ur neibors.
The cover herself and open the door.
-tell us congratilations.
-congratilations, but why?
-we born a child =)
After 5 min someone knocks on the door.
-Whos There?
-Its the Thief.
She cover herself and opens the door.
-tell me congratilations.
-congratilations, but why?
-I runned away from the cup (police).
After a while... someone knocks again on the door.
-Whos There?
-Its the cup.
She cover herself and opens the door.
-tell me congratilations.
-congratilations, but why?
-I coutch the Thief =)
After a while... someone again knocks the door.
-Whos there?
-Its the blind man.
she thinks, its ok anyway he is blind so he wont see me, so the doesnt cover herself and open the door.
He tell her: tell me congratilations.
-congratilations, but why?
-Im not blind anymore.
K!ddo™- The Coolest Kid!
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Join date : 2009-07-13
Age : 28
Location : Haifa, Israel -
Lenne- TamerUniv Master
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Shuraka- TamerUniv Leader
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Lenne- TamerUniv Master
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but are they funny?
Dede- TamerUniv Novice
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Age : 31
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K!ddo™- The Coolest Kid!
- Posts : 222
Join date : 2009-07-13
Age : 28
Location : Haifa, Israel -
Lenne- TamerUniv Master
- Posts : 808
Join date : 2009-07-21
Age : 32
Dede- TamerUniv Novice
- Posts : 63
Join date : 2009-07-13
Age : 31
Location : Georgia/UK
Shuraka- TamerUniv Leader
- Posts : 786
Join date : 2009-07-13
Age : 33 -
Dede- TamerUniv Novice
- Posts : 63
Join date : 2009-07-13
Age : 31
Location : Georgia/UK
Lenne- TamerUniv Master
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Join date : 2009-07-21
Age : 32
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